Oh my! When this comes out of my mouth you usually don't know if it's bad or good. Right now, if you hear me say this, it is not good. Not good at all. I loved being pregnant both times. I was happy and I even loved wearing maternity clothes. I do not love what it's left me with. The damage has been done and I hate to say it, but my bladder has suffered the worst of it. Now, normally it's not a problem, but right now is allergy season. I need not say another word for any mom who is reading this.
The bottom line is you do not want to be sitting underneath me when I sneeze. SOMETIMES I tinkle. But just a little bit. HOW does a problem like this occur in a young woman of my age? I don't know! I'm not even 30! It I continue at this rate, heaven help us when I am 60.
I will be driving along, minding my own business. I am usually singing out loud and may be bustin a move on the freeway. I can still do things like that, I'm not even 30. Then suddenly, I start to feel a twitch behind my nose. Oh my, I think to myself. I stop breathing through my nose in an effort to stop the pollen from intruding into my body. Soon, the twitch increases and I am on the verge of a sneeze that won't come. Nothing is worse than a sneeze that won't come. My nose is running, my eyes are watering, and I'm doing that strange wheezing thing. I am no longer singing or dancing. I can hardly see the road and the BAM! The sneeze explodes out of my head!! And I hate to say it, a tinkle has also escaped. "OH MY!" I say. Partly because of the shear velocity of the sneeze and partly because I have peed a little bit and I'm not even 30. Is one sneeze and one step over into humiliation enough for me? NO. I am now on a roll. 3 sometimes 4 more sneezes rack my body and with each one.....
Oh my. I can't believe I am even writing about it. When the worst of it is over I usually look at Greg. Water runs down my cheeks and snot runs freely with it. Downstairs, water is running as well. I look at him and softly say "oh my, honey." He smiles and pats my leg (down by my knee...he's no fool) and says "It's all good baby." I feel better. I mean, his opinion of me matters the most and if I don't gross him out then it truly is all good. I just can't believe my body betrays me like this......and I'm not even 30.
5 comments:
I recall this little problem of yours dating back to our college years. I've also heard about a dressing room incident as well. hmmmm....that might be an interesting post on my blog, a tell all about Jen's bladder:)
Just to make you feel better, I can't even jump on a tramp without having that problem. I have to make sure my bladder is completely empty before I attempt that, and that only works sometimes;)
i feel your pain!!!
Ok, if you say I'm not even 30 one more time I might drive to lehi and smack your bottom. I am 30!! :) i love ya girl and I can hear you saying "Oh my" so clearly in my head. I haven't heard from you . . . or handsome eric in a while. Where ya been??
Well, I'm with Holly on this one. Maybe we will have to write that special "tell ALL" post together. I didn't think it could get any worse.
But...no matter what silly thing happens, I still love ya!
I'll add my own humiliation... once in a while the treadmill becomes a problem. The other day I thought my water broke, and then I remembered I'm not pregnant. I had just wet my pants. Luckily it was dark in the cardiocinema and I had a sweatshirt.
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