No-talent show

Remember when you were a Beehive and you had that lesson on talents? And you wrote your talents on a piece of paper and maybe you wrote talents you saw in each other as well? I do. We were all a little reluctant to write anything about ourselves because that seemed.....vain. So we passed our papers around and when they came back they said stunning things like: Musical. Or dresses nice. Or good artist. I have just assumed that those are the kind of things we mean when we talk about talents. Recently I've discovered that the REAL talents people posses are not the things they can DO, but the things they ARE. Talents that are nestled so deeply into them the talent is just who they are. It's hard to dig them out and distinguish them into a list. And maybe after you read this you will disagree and decide that these things aren't talents at all. Rather personality traits. I like to think of them as talents. Unique abilities that we were each given. A little bundle of gifts given as we were sent on our way. Much like the first day of school. "Here is your lunch. Eat it all, make good choices, and behave yourself." Yep. I think that's exactly what my Heavenly Mother did. At the risk of sounding.....vain (and I assure you the Beehive inside of me is not at all comfortable with this) here are a few of my favorite talents:

1. Stubborn. What? That's not a talent. In fact, one of my besties once told me that it is the single worst aspect of who I am and it will be the destruction of me someday. I just looked at him and thought....huh. Wanna know a secret? It's one of my favorite parts of me. It's number one on this list for a reason. I love it. Most people look at the trait of stubbornness as a negative thing. Yet, perseverance, tenacity, determination are all viewed as positive. Well, I don't see a difference. Stubbornness is not black or white. It's gray. It's positive and negative connotation is determined by how you use it. It's served me well. You don't like it? I don't care. (See that? It's serving me well RIGHT NOW!)

2. Compassionate. Yes. That's a good one. And one I have as well. In fact, Compassionate Service Leader was my favorite calling. Mostly because it was easy. Often, I will be doing something and a thought will enter my mind. Something like: Take Mr. Silitoe down the street some peaches and banana bread. And I do. Or last week in Sacrament I reached over the bench and snatched the baby of the woman who was running a three ring circus with her screaming 2 year old. It's the SEEING of an opportunity which makes this a talent. Most people are more than happy to help if they are asked. Or assigned. Or if the sign up comes around to take a dinner in. But that's not really compassion. Compassion is seeing it and recognizing the need in the first place. And not everyone can do that.

I could go on and on, but my talents are not what this is all about. It's about the talents I WANT and don't have. Things I see in others that I covet. (Covet. Now there's something about me that's not good. Why do you pick on stubborn when there are much worse parts of me?)

Something happened tonight that made me realize one that is huge. It's Graciousness. I wish I was more gracious. The kind of person who makes you feel like you are the most important person in the world. The person who makes you feel good about who you are. The person who sees the accomplishments of others in this world and is joyful for them! Excited by their victories and first in line to celebrate. Yeah....that's not me. And I don't think that it's something I can learn or develop. When someone is THAT kind of gracious, it is so much a part of who they are, you can't imagine them any other way. I know people like this. I am not.

Want to know what else I want to be? Passionate. Not the kind of passionate that is inappropriate for my family blog because that's not on THIS list. The passion that drives people to do the things they LOVE. Something they believe in that makes them enthusiastic about life. Oprah said once that you're not living life unless you are doing what you are passionate about. So I thought about it for a long time. I got nothin, Oprah. I have no cause, or hobby, or anything that I feel that way about. And maybe I do but I haven't found it. Is that what you were going to say? I've thought of that. And I have come to the conclusion that it's probably there, waiting to be discovered, but it's on some obscure list. My passion in life? It's probably hunting zebras with poisonous darts.

I could go on and on about what I wish I were. The point is, I think THESE kinds of talents are not things you can work at and obtain. They aren't on the practice makes perfect list. Either you've got it or you don't.

The question is, what do YOU have? I'd really like to know. This isn't like the parting thought of that Beehive lesson. Something for you to take home and ponder. Tell me! Anyone who reads this blog can contribute, but if your blog is listed on my sidebar? It's YOU I'm talking to.