It occurred to me recently, that there are some lessons and skills sets requiring more than one session of study.
Gardening, for instance, may take more than one season to master.
Business taxes (it seems) take more than one year to complete successfully. You know, avoiding alarming letters and notices arriving from the IRS as part of their you-thought-you-did-it-right Shock and Awe Program.
Round brushing your own hair is something I hope comes to me before my hair all turns gray and falls out.
And according to my husband, I need to enroll in a refresher course on Mac & Cheese and Kool-Aid.
I distinctly remember teaching "Potty Practices 101" to my bright eyed and curious toddlers a few years ago. We had a dolly that "went" and books complete with buttons to push that sounded like a toilet flushing. We were tight with Prudence and her Mommy. And like gardening and taxes, it would seem these many years later we needed a refresher.
How does one go about approaching a touchy and embarrassing topic such as this with a 5th grader, 3rd grader, and over sized amputee?
Family Home Evening. That's how.
We revisited the basics, such as the ever-popular "3 for pee" toilet paper square counting technique.
Also, the most important Sit or Stand dilemma that faces my boys. (I say sit....always)
I may have ended with Rules of Wiping and How to Make Your Mother Proud Toilet Cleaning.
They were soaked in embarrassment. Despite recent evidence, everyone was quick to deny that THEY had any need for such a horrible refresher. I explained that I was their mother, I loved them and could help them find a solution to most any problem they may face. Even super embarrassing ones. If they are having a problem with odors of some sort, and are too embarrassed to bring it up, they could even write me a letter! Problems of any sort are easily solved with your mother on your side! She understands all kinds of bathroom dilemmas, and always has their back (side)! She can be REALLY COOL about personal issues.
Then to prove it was true, I taught them all the baseball diarrhea song.
I knew that MOTY was mine when I looked at their faces as I finished up the second verse.
Disclaimer: If your child associates with my child, and has suddenly learned a "new song" at school, don't come knocking on my door with your questions. I will play dumb all the day long... By the way, if they get stumped on "running to second" the rhyming word is "disinfectant." I had to google it.
3 comments:
that is too funny
I don't know the baseball potty song. Probably explains a lot.
When you are running in to home and your pants are full of foam, Diarrhea Diarrhea. Is that the baseball potty song that you are referring to? Well, my kids learned it from their grandma so no worries. They already know it.
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