Happy

There have been years of troubles, months of sadness and periods of depression in my life.  I have said hundreds of times with tears in my eyes "I am so sad."  It's a deep dark hole.  I have realized and am grateful for the last few years of happiness.  I am truly happy and I am thankful every day.  Have my trials fixed themselves?  No.  Am I worry free and living a lazy life of luxury?  No.  Do I still have off days?  Yep.  But overall, I am very happy. 

Today I read THIS ARTICLE about a talk given at BYU Education Week by a Seminary teacher named Hank Smith.  The article stated:  "Brother Smith explained that the number 1 contributor to happiness, according to Dr. Martin Seligman, was the quality of a person’s social circle." 

Wow.  I have to agree.  It's no surprise that I have wonderful friends and family.  I've blogged about them many times before.  Even Greg who gives me a run for my money is becoming more like the person I married.  I forgot how funny he is.  Likewise, it's no surprise to anyone that there are toxic people in this world.  They seep in misery and make everyone around them miserable too.  There is constant contention and blame.  It's not the way to live your life.  Rid your life of these people.  Only let those people in who inspire you, help you, and make you a better person.  I have learned that you can't change anyone.  You can't make them choose better choices, or seek help.  And there comes a point when the Polish Proverb "Not my circus, not my monkeys" comes into play.

I don't really know what switched my emotional switch.  I don't think you can "choose" to be happy and it just happens.  I believe that there is a season for everything.  We travel through them.  It's why we are here on this earth.  To gain experience. or to weather the seasons of this life.

The article also listed 10 things that happy people do.  I've included them here along with my own thoughts in blue. 


Ten things that supremely happy people do:

1.       Happy people surround themselves with other happy people. Joy is contagious. People are four times more likely to be happy in the future with happy people around them.
I have lots of happy people around me.  And I like it!  I have had unhappy people around me too.  And I gave them the boot.

2.       Happy people try to be happy. When happy people don’t feel happy, they cultivate a happy thought and smile about it.
Some days, I have to make a huge effort to be happy.  And I do it for my kids.  But when I need a happy thought to help me along, I think of the times I tricked people into pulling the irrigation gate that explodes into a geyser.  It was awesome.  Each time.

3.       Happy people spend money more on others than they spend on themselves. Givers experience what scientists call the “helper’s high.”
Do you have moments when you "get" something you've heard others talk about?  A moment of conversion, if you will?  I had that two years ago with service.  I am a much more service motivated person.  I pray for opportunities, and the ability to recognize them.  Living a service oriented life will bring you happiness.

4.       Happy people have deep in-person conversations. Sitting down to talk about what makes a person tick is a good practice for feeling good about life.
I do this.  And I enjoy it immensely.  I have my favorite people to do this with, but I recognize it as part of my deep rooted friendships throughout my whole life. 

5.       Happy people use laughter as a medicine. A good old-fashioned chuckle releases lots of good neurotransmitters. A study showed that children on average laugh 300 times a day versus adults who laugh 15 times a day.
It may sound strange, but I have learned how to laugh from people.  I have recognized it as something they do, admired it, and tried to incorporate it into my own life.  The best example of this is my cousin Tammy.  Wow, do I love her, and I am so uplifted and inspired by her.  I am happier when I spend time with her and it's because she laughs through everything.  (And she's gone through ALOT.)

6.       Happy people use the power of music. Researchers found that music can match the anxiety-reducing effects of massage therapy.
I love the music that I love because of the message.  Not just any music.  Music that speaks to me.  Have you heard THIS SONG?

7.       Happy people exercise and eat a healthful diet. Eating a poor diet can contribute to depression.
HA HA HA HA....  Ahhhhh.  Hmmm.  Well.  HA HA HA HA.

8.       Happy people take the time to unplug and go outside. Uninterrupted screen time brings on depression and anxiety.
I don't much like outside.  I don't like to be hot.  BUT what I do love and appreciate every day is the beauty of the earth around me.  I've said it before, and I stand by it... the mountains in Ogden make up for the people in Ogden.  They are gorgeous. 

9.       Happy people get enough sleep. When people run low on sleep, they are prone to feel a lack of clarity, bad moods, and poor judgment.
How well do you know me?!  Sleep is a key component in my life.  I love it.  Don't call me early on a Saturday morning.

10.   Happy people are spiritual.
I was inactive for a number of years in Lehi.  I was angry, and bitter and confused.  My life was hard and I didn't want to admit the link between keeping the commandments and the peace it brings.  Even now that's kind of hard for me to do.  But I do know that our trials won't permanently break us.  That the strength and insight they bring is worth the hard times.  The growth we experience is for our good.  I have struggled with the ability to see my Heavenly Father in the midst of hard times, yet looking back His hand is constant in my life.  Doing the things I know I should, holding a calling, a temple recommend, family prayer, etc. enrich our lives.  Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect.  It doesn't mean that you have everything you want or that your life looks the way you dreamed it would.  Being happy is often being open to experiences to work hard with wonderful people, being content with yourself and your growth, and recognizing the blessing you have. 

And if you do it right, you are given gifts of laughter along with way.  And laughing til you pee your pants is the only way to live.